Well, Well, Well

I hope anyone who wanted the mix tape i put on here has already got it because the post and the file at megaupload have both mysteriously vanished.

I think it was the nazis but it could have been anyone.

Space Cowboy With A Laser Gun

Buying films from £1 shops is one of the many pleasures of the modern world. The quality varies from classics (Donnie Darko + Scum) to bottom of the barrel TV movies staring actors that the 80s shit out way back when. The 3 i watched this weekend come from the lower end of the scale.

Python
Giant snake (strangely not a python at all) eats it's way though a small town. Although firmly rooted in a sea of shit it's not without its charms. Not sure if it really wants to go all out for laughs, almost feels like two separate films one serious the other with tongue firmly in cheek. Casper Van Dien is trying out an accent for his role as the head of some military thing, as if his southern drawl wasn't poor enough he frequently slips out of it. Robert Englunds career seems to be split between Freddy Kruger and creepy scientists/professors played well over the top. When it's trying to scare it fails miserably but is genuinely funny in places, the police force in particular have some killer lines and the fight in kids play park is quality.

Lost Voyage
Judd Nelson has got fat since the 80s, real fat. Cruise ship vanishes in the Bermuda triangle and returns 30 years later. So Judd goes aboard along with a film crew from a most haunted style show and Lance Hendrikson who is there to be as bad ass as possible. Genuinely creepy for about an hour, the dark, narrow corridors creating at least a little bit of atmosphere all of which is ruined in the last half hour. Remember the Casper movie with Christina Ricci well the CGI ghosts in this look a bit like them but shitter. Fat Judd Nelson being chased by casper the friendly ghost is just embarrassing for all involved.

Deep Freeze
Dog sized prehistoric insect kills scientists and crew at arctic drilling platform. Now a bad horror film should at least contain graphic violence and plenty of nudity, this has neither. There is a shower scene but its a fat man with a hairy back, this bit is horrific. Defiantly the worst of the three, watching what looks like a turn with legs chase around a group of fully clothed young people is about as entertaining as new BBC sitcom Lab Rats. I should have bought the documentary called Modern Farming instead.

I'll do a post about what i'm listening to at the moment in the near future, probably when the new Abe Vigoda album turns up. Expect it to contain Camper Van Beethoven, The Moldy Peaches, The Flying Burrito Brothers, Those Dancing Days, Abe Vigoda and Kitsune Tabloid (compiled and mixed by Digitalism).

Behold

My new hi-fi in all its 1980s glory. It's been baptised with a mixture of 2562, Girl Talk and Hot Club De Paris.

So recently i've been selling a load of my old t-shirts on eBay. Seven have gone already for just over £50. Got another load on now if your interested you can find 'em here i think my auctions.

Well my 6 month contract at the post office ends at the end of July and its kinda in the air if it'll get extended. If it doesn't a clever bit of holiday placement by me will see me finish on the 19th and get paid until the 28th. Applied for another job at the post office but this time in bognor so hopefully that'll be step one towards my inevitable move southwards.

Oh and check out the bitchin' Lou Reed shirt i bought here

Stupid Morning

I woke up at 7.30 this morning, 7.30 on a sunday morning! It's taken 4 months but now my body is offically in adult work mode, i just can't have a lie in anymore. To make things worse they're interviewing Keith Vas on BBC breakfast and everyone is pretending he's a real politition and not just a scaremonger intent on pinning the countrys problems on an easy scapegoat rather than their root causes.

Right i suppose i should do something now i'm up, i think coffee is in order then i might watch 'The Crazies' or play on my 360. After that i'll go binge drinking, stab a few people and generally behave in an anti-social manner, that's if Mr Vas is to be belived.

Oh and giggle much

You Guys Are Messed Up Like Texas Rangers

Right let's start with some music,

Zombie-Zombie - 'A Land For Renegades'

French electro duo influenced by the horror soundtracks of Goblin and John Carpenter. Largely instrumental except for the cover of Iggy Pop's 'Nightclubbing', a couple of soundbites culled from the new york library and a few piercing screams thrown in for good measure. As if how perfectly they embrace the spirit of 80's horror wasn't clear enough there is this handy fan video of the single 'Driving this road til death sets you free' used to soundtrack a condensed version of 'The Thing' using GI Joes.



That's pretty bitchin' ain't it, if that's left you wanting more here's a coupla tracks from the album.

Zombie-Zombie - 'Driving this road....

Zombie-Zombie - 'Nightclubbing'

I'll do a post about other stuff later.

Europop FTW!

For anyone who didn't spend their Saturday night watching the Eurovision song contest shame on you! Like every other year it was mostly full of Euro dross but there was a least one good song and a couple of quality giggles. So here's my top 3 from Eurovision 2008.

France - Sebastien Tellier & The Soul Gospel Singers - 'Divine'



This was the one good song and the first eurovision entry I've heard well before it became the french entry. Far too cool for school and the rest of Europe.


Latvia - Pirates of the Sea - 'Wolves of the Sea'



Pirates are so awesome! This reminds me of the pirate song from Lazytown


Spain - Rodolfo Chikilicuatre - 'Baila El Chiki Chiki'



Spain chose their song from entries on MySpace, total Robocop madness!

So that was Eurovision 2008, we came last again. It's about time we wised and realised that we're not gonna win ever again and stop taking it seriously. Along with France and Germany we're in a unique position as because we pay for most of the contest we get automatic entry into the final. So next year there's only one thing we can enter..........GRINDCORE!!!!! But none of this short 30 second grindcore, we need a 10 minute grindcore odyssey. Either that or a random tramp banging a frying pan while serenading a can of special brew, Europe would vote for that.

Damn Right I Want A Flake

I'm supposed to be a work now but i forgot to set my alarm and woke up 3 hours late. After coming round to the idea of having the day off i set about thinking of what to say when i make the inevitable call to work. Well I've been thinking for a couple of hours and have come to the conclusion that it's too late to call with a plausible excuse, there is no way to explain why i phoning at half one so I'm just not gonna bother. It's over time at a different post office so it's not like i have to go back there so I'm just gonna forget about it.

Fresh from this oh so childish solution to an adult problem it's time i discussed the most difficult part of the transition from childhood to the responsibilities of the adult world. When do you become too old to go charging out the house every time you hear the ice cream mans van. The purveyor of frozen goodies has begun to come round again and every time i hear the little tune there's a split second where I'm prepared to grab my money and fly out the door like i used to but then i stop and get a little sad feeling inside. Eventually i'll give in but instead of spending my pocket money on one single cone i'm gonna have a pocket full of my hard earned cash and i'm gonna stump up for a double cone and a screwball for the cold bubblegum and maybe a moo milk as well.

Good Times!

Got Wood?

I'm gonna start using this blog again me thinks.